Chapter 1

Do not mention names; I cannot even recognize all the faces

The rain outside has intensified again, and the rain on the tiles resembles lines, transforming into a long curtain of rain

Xuelan could not control her tears; she was already dead, yet she did not want to die, because she was reluctant to part with it

She is reluctant to part with this love; she knows that her mother has sacrificed too much for her. Perhaps death would be a release, yet even so, she does not wish to die. She selfishly wants to hold on to her mother, because she cannot bear to lose someone who loves her so deeply. How could she bear to die when she is so happy?

In fact, people do not fear death; they only fear the separation that death brings

However, when she woke up the next day, she could only vaguely see the old tent ceiling

Xuelan knew that she might already be dead; this awareness had existed in her since she was very young

The main door of the room was suddenly pushed open.

Xuelan had always been quite introverted due to her heart condition, which limited her interactions with others. Arriving in this unfamiliar time and place, surrounded by nothing familiar, it was inevitable that she would feel anxious and fearful. Moreover, she was not originally from this household and, for certain reasons, was looked down upon by others, making her even less inclined to step out of the door.

Those who wished to live happily together are no longer here, so for whom does a healthy heart beat?

After being confined indoors for more than half a year, the elders finally relented and said that she could go out for a walk

Xuelan's mother never allows her to wallow in self-pity; she always encourages her to live with strength and optimism. She says that she will definitely ensure her daughter lives to an old age with gray hair, and for this, she will work hard.

"Then... then I will go with you..." Xuelan said, touching the spot she had poked, a bit apprehensively.

The room was shrouded in darkness, and a frail figure sat by the window, staring blankly at the pale light outside.

It seems that Liu Wujie was punished by being forced to kneel and beaten for contradicting the lady of the house, resulting in her throwing a tantrum and jumping into the pond. Afterwards, everyone scolded her for her reckless behavior, saying it would be better if she died to save food and avoid bringing shame. The elderly lady of the house cursed her as a harbinger of misfortune, claiming that just seeing her was distressing, and forbade her from leaving the room, even allowing her to die there.

"Both the master and the mistress have asked you to go out, yet you still put on airs and pretend to be ill. Isn't this disrespecting them? You foolish person, how many kind words have I said to you? Are you trying to wear me out? Truly a wretch! I don't know where you got all this pettiness from; a few harsh words and you want to end it all. If you really did die, I wouldn't have to endure this torment!" Aunt Li extended a finger and sharply poked Xuelan's forehead. I don't know where you got all this pettiness from; a few harsh words and you want to end it all. If you really did die, I wouldn't have to endure this torment!" Aunt Li extended a finger and sharply poked Xuelan's forehead.

When Shelan first opened her eyes, she was confronted by a room full of strangers

She looked into the dimly lit copper mirror, and the reflection revealed a completely unfamiliar face—a little girl, thin, timid, and fearful

Every new morning feels like a precious gift, invaluable in its rarity

There is a thought that lingers in her heart, yet she is always unwilling to confront it

Sister Wu, come out to m.hetushu.com for dinner

"Aunt..." Xuelan called out, unsure of what to say, and could only resort to the excuse: "I... I don't feel well, I have a headache..."

"Hurry, take your medicine." Wang Ma brought over the steaming bowl of medicine

With a creak, the intricately carved wooden door opened, and a middle-aged woman dressed in a floral white dress entered, carrying a wooden tray.

Although Xuelan had long been prepared, when the moment arrived, it was still unbearably painful, as if her heart had returned to a state of being riddled with wounds, being tightly clenched, causing immense anguish

Two unfamiliar women wept beside her, calling out to her, "Fifth Sister"

The sound resonated so clearly in the steady rain that it left Xuelan increasingly dazed and confused

This is exactly right, go change into some bright clothes, smile at the people, and apologize to the old ladies; that will ease a lot of the tension. It will also allow me, your aunt, to have a better time in this household and receive fewer disdainful looks. Aunt Li pulled Xuelan over to the wardrobe and began to sort through the clothes.

Wang Ma pondered that Fifth Sister had been ill for more than half a year, staying cooped up in the house every day, not stepping out even once, looking like a frail patient, which was quite distressing to see

Xuelan still remembers that night

"My lady, it is pouring rain, why are you still opening the window? It is already autumn, aren't you afraid of catching a cold!" Wang Ma set down the tray and hurried over, removing the wooden post that was propping the window open.

Every person experiences birth, aging, illness, and death, much like a flower. Some flowers are fortunate enough to experience blooming and withering, while others, in the prime of their blossoming, are abruptly cut down by fate

Xuelan has congenital heart disease, and her father also had it. When Xuelan was five years old, her father passed away, leaving only her mother and her to rely on each other.

Her voice was stern, and with a glare from her eyes, she exuded an air of authority. This woman was the mother of Xuelan's body, known only by the surname Li, and the servants referred to her as Aunt Li.

After that person left, Xuelan sighed, opened the window again, and let the rainwater gently fall on her face and body in the slanting wind

However, as the days went by, she still did not wake up as she had imagined; instead, her dreams became increasingly vivid

Before going to sleep, her mother tucked her in and happily told her that there was hope for a heart transplant

Later, she was able to get out of bed, but she could no longer speak freely, as this was not the era in which she lived

The stones and trees appear like blue smoke, hazy and indistinct, exuding an air of desolation

She cried for a very long time, and people came to comfort her, while others came to scold her. She could not take it in, nor did she want to listen, because this kind of separation brought a feeling of unbearable pain, making her feel that it did not matter whether she lived or died

She cannot attend school, engage in intense activities or emotions, and must stay at home every day. Even so, the doctor has stated that if her heart cannot be replaced, she will not live beyond the age of twenty-five

What exactly is this place? Why did I come here? Xuelan doesn't seem to care much.

In the afternoon, amidst the books, a heavy rain fell, with raindrops pouring down rapidly, covering the ground with yellowed phoenix tree leaves

At first, she was ill, lying in bed all day, silently listening to the chatter of those women. She never interjected, as she was too shocked to speak.

Countless nights, she called out for her mother in the warmth of her bed, her tears soaking the pillow

It is not pity for one's own short life, but rather pity for the beloved.

Before her stood merely a twelve-year-old girl, dressed in a light blue cotton jacket. Due to having suffered a serious illness, her small face was thin and yellowish. She obediently took the medicine and tilted her head back to drink it all at once

She always felt as if she were dreaming, so every night before falling asleep, she thought that when she opened her eyes again, she might have awakened.

Why are you such a disobedient child? I asked you to come out for dinner, yet you are throwing a tantrum! A woman wearing a red coat adorned with a pattern of intertwined lotus flowers rushed in.

For someone who waits for death every day, although she is as young as the morning glow, her heart has long since decayed like that of an old woman. If it were not for a profound love that has continuously supported her, she would have long lost the motivation to live.

This is a very old-fashioned family, and Xuelan has only seen similar situations in novels and history books. A large family, with four or five concubines, more than a dozen siblings, from the elderly matriarch down to the nephews and nieces, four generations living under one roof, with over twenty members.

Xuelan glanced at the vests and cotton jackets in the cabinet that resembled costumes, gritted her teeth and put one on, then tied two large red flowers in her hair. She recalled the first time she went out, with her hair down and tied in a ponytail, she received a good scolding from Aunt Li. Now, she dared not do that; instead, she braided her hair into two large braids, one on each side, sticking out.

In the garden outside the window, there is a small pond, where a few remnants of lotus sway gently. During the continuous autumn rain, the raindrops fall on the lotus leaves, producing a sound akin to the dull clinking of broken jade

"What nonsense!" the woman said angrily, "You say you're unwell but you still have the window open for the breeze. The doctor has said you are fine, yet you continue to pretend otherwise. Don't you realize that others are laughing at you?"

Mother is exhausted from this work, yet her face is always beaming with a smile

Her small face was snow-white, with eyes slightly upturned at the corners. Her jet-black hair was styled into a bun, adorned with a hairpin that had dangling pearls. On her fair wrist, she wore two silver bracelets

Outside, the scene is shrouded in a dark gray hue, with moisture spreading everywhere, creating a damp and chilly atmosphere

"Well, this looks good." Aunt Li turned Xuelan's face left and right, and only then did she reveal a smile, leading her out of the bedroom

"Then I will bring you food later," Wang Ma smiled and walked away, her footsteps as light as a cat's.

This expression reflected Shelan's inner turmoil; she was extremely anxious and even felt as though she was losing her mind

"Grandmother, I feel quite uncomfortable..." Xuelan said hesitantly

Sister Wu, let's have dinner in the hall outside, as the lady has instructed...

But now, she has left, leaving her mother all alone. How lonely her mother must be. Her mother will miss her, and just thinking about the pain this will cause her mother makes her unable to hold back her tears